Christine and Rita were married this past summer in a simple but meaningful wedding ceremony.  When we first spoke, there was a desire to incorporate much of the spiritual aspects of their beliefs and values from the Vedic/Yogic traditions utilizing the learning's from their teacher's lineage. 

As we carefully co-created their ceremony, we explored many possibilities.  Christine and Rita chose to incorporate a mudra practice, taken from their teacher's lineage.  The practice is a conscious process and series of positions and gestures, with meditation, that honor one's light and joins body, mind and soul in union.  This was a sacred and lovely ritual that prepared for the exchange of vows. 

This picture depicts the final mudra of a series that come's from Shiva-Lingam's mudra practice.  For those unfamiliar; "mudra" is a sanskrit word and means: a gesture, which focuses and directs energy in a yoga pose or meditation.  (photo courtesy of Martha Lazarus)

I am always amazed at how creative and beautiful wedding ceremonies can be when conscious intention and the fun of allowing yourself to be creative is brought to the design.  With each ceremony designed and officiated, my heart opens a bit more and the depth of my understanding grows.

I thank all of the people who have allowed me to work with them, it is a true blessing! Enjoy this lovely weekend!

Today is the vernal equinox, or as most of us may know it the first day of spring! Equinox actually means equal night, while vernal means fresh, new, pertaining to spring.  So it is no wonder that on this day we have an opportunity to bring both balance and possibility into our minds, hearts and actions.

Just as some of you took the opportunity to celebrate and honor the winter solstice, with a ritual of turning inward and contemplating what it was you wanted to bring forth, now is the time to consciously seed your garden and put your intention into the world for that which you wish to reap & sow. 

As a possible ritual to do this, consider the following:

Spend a few moments outside today, in silence asking yourself, what are the three things you would like to create, achieve and/or nurture this spring.

Once you have them, jot them down on 3 pieces of small paper or you can find larger stones that you can write them on in marker.

If you have access to plot of ground, or garden, find a place to either rest your stones or to lightly bury your paper (the intention would be to dig these up in summer as not to soil the earth).  You might also decide to use containers to place the papers inside of instead of putting them in the ground.

If you don't have access to an area outside, find a special container(s) to use and place them by a window.

Now once again in silence, think about the ways you can bring more balance into your life and repeat the same process as above. 

Once you have completed this, visit this area for 2 minutes each day.  I like to do the am and pm myself.   This will help you keep these thoughts conscious and alive.

Enjoy Spring!

As a relationship coach, I work with many people who wish to strengthen their relationships and live with greater awareness and intention as they strive to keep their relationship vibrant, fun and loving.   The common complaint I hear is, "This is great when we are working with you and have this focused time to explore our challenges.  We can hold onto what we learn here for a week, maybe even a bit longer, but our lives get complicated and after a while, we slip back to our old patterns.   How do we find the time and/or remember to keep this going?" 

This is a terrific inquiry, and while there are many tips and tricks you can incorporate, my answer usually focuses on some specific practices you can easily incorporate into your life.

• Speak a vow to each other at the beginning of each day:  this works particularly well when you wake in the morning if you can coordinate your schedules.  (see my blog entry: A Post-Wedding Vow)      
  
• At the end of each day acknowledge something you are grateful for with your loved one,  even if it has been a difficult day between you…it might be how grateful you are that you are able to work through things, or trust that you will come together again.
• Make a specific time to get together at least once a week…make this time sacred i.e a "date night" or a special time after the day is over that you chat without TV or other distraction. 
  
• Find a time to focus on the relationship separate from “date” night.  Monthly is usually reasonable, and weekly if you can fit it in is terrific!  Use this time to  either create a shared vision, or to explore relationship philosophy by read a book on relationships, or discussing how you can each listen better to one another. 
  
• Finally, remind yourself that you and your spouse, partner, friend, lover or family member, are human and will make mistakes.  The simple truth is that neither you or your loved one would do anything to intentionally cause pain.

Share your own thoughts so others can benefit! 

As a wedding officiant, I speak with many couples about their hopes, desires and dreams for their wedding day.  While if not asked that help us ensure we are a good fit for each other. 

Here are some other questions you may wish to ask in the process of selecting your officiant:

Is it as important to them as it is to you, that there is a connection between the three of you?

Are they registered in the state and/or town that you are getting married in?

If they are an ordained clergy, where did they receive their ordination (through a seminary or was it an on-line ordination)?

What is their experience level and what do people say about them?

What does their fee  include (i.e. initial meeting, rehearsal, travel, second meeting, phone time etc)? If their fee includes a rehearsal, but you are not requiring them to be present, will they reduce the fee?

How will they interface with other wedding professionals such as Photographers, Musicians, Videographers, on-site coordinators and/or a wedding planner? 

 Do they have “rules” for what is allowed during the ceremony?

In the event they have an emergency, do they have access to other professionals who will be able to fill-in?  If not, what is your recourse?

Will they leave you with a keepsake copy of the ceremony?

Please let me know if there are other questions that you think are important and that I haven't covered in my past blogs on How to Select a Wedding Officiant.  Finding the right person to officiate at your ceremony can be fun and educational.  Taking the time and starting early enough will ensure that you have the pick of the top officiants in your area.  Enjoy!